Dear Office Email,

It’s time you knew the truth. I hate you. Credit:

Like smash-you-with-a-baseball-bat-if-you-were-a physical-object kind of hate. I’ve never met anyone that caused me so much misery. Whenever I see you, a fluffy little bunny dies along with a part of my soul.

We didn’t use to be like this. Once upon a time, I used to love turning you on. You were the first thing I looked at in the mornings, and you used to reward me with these little nuggets of information. All that info was so new and… exciting. I used to love reading them on you and sharing them with you.  You helped me to learn so much, and you provided an oasis for me to escape to in the midst of a dreary cubicle prison.

The Dark Side Kicks In

But you were plotting all this while to get me addicted. It …