Just a story to set the tone for this discussion. If you had known me 20 years ago, I was not exactly a charming specimen of the male gender. I'm soft of like Ted, but not cute. A female undergrad once asked me to carry her bag for her. I told her no, "Because scarly I fall down how ?" During my NUS days, I struggled to get a date, then I normally screw up my chances for a second date because I am a troll. I can't really help it - Gen X girls are so self-contradictory about marriage, relationships and career and I had a great time pointing this out to them - as a result my wife still laughs at me for getting a girlfriend so late in my life. I also never understood when I should be providing a listening ear versus giving advice. I am ......