I’ve always had a problem with shoes: No pair of shoes lasts me for more than eight months. No, really. I’m a shoe-serial killer, and I strike fear into the hearts of shoes everywhere.

Take this pair of work shoes I bought recently. I purchased them eight months ago because they were on sale (at $43.90, who could resist?). Guess where I bought them from? That’s right: Bata. Which, in common Singaporean slang, stands for “Buy And Throw Away”.

I should’ve known better.

I was walking to my usual coffee stall yesterday morning when my Looks-Expensive-But-Are-Actually-Really-Cheap shoes decided to give way. With my shoe sole flapping like a dying trout, there was absolutely no way that I could walk like a normal human being. So while I was limping to the office, my boss asked me if I was injured and needed to take MC.

I urgently need ...